Monday, August 30, 2010

Perfect Moment Monday -- Very Thoughtful

Each week I participate in Perfect Moment Monday, sponsored by the blog, According to Weebles, "Perfect Moment Monday is about noticing a perfect moment rather than creating one. Perfect Moments can be momentous or ordinary or somewhere in between." And so, here is a Perfect Moment for this week.

The end of this week marks the two year anniversary of the death of my ex-husband, M, the father of our three sons. Although it may not sound like a great way to start a Perfect Moment Monday post, please read on because Perfect Moments can happen anytime, even in the face of grief.

A couple of weeks ago, the boys were invited to Grandpa J's house (my ex's father) to have a barbecue. Even though there have been some rough spots (being the EX-daughter-in-law), I am finding a new relationship with the people who I once considered my family.

I feel it's good for the boys to connect back with M's family. As my sister would describe it, it's as though the boys are "returning to the well." It's part of who they are and reminds them of their dad...with good shared memories, common genetics, etc.

When they returned home that evening, they each carried a pillow that Grandpa J's girlfriend, Toni, had made for them. One son turns 15 next weekend and the twins are 13 1/2, so they are NOT into stuffed animals or cuddly all. But that evening they were literally hugging these pillows.

You see, Toni had used some of their dad's Carhartt t-shirts, the brand he liked, and made this very special gift for each of the boys.

Each pillow is unique and personal. One has a New York Yankee's patch above the Carhartt pocket, one has a CSU patch, and the last has a cowboy boot...all things associated with their father and what he loved in his life.

I don't know for sure, but I'm guessing there may be one additional pillow for the boys' cousin who is just a year younger than the twins...and I have a sneaking suspicion that his patch may be The Broncos, because M absolutely LOVED the Broncos...a HUGE fan!  

As I saw the boys with their pillows, I caught glimpses of their father in each of their faces. M's energy and spirit was with us that evening (as I'm sure he is around the boys quite often, watching them grow into wonderful young men).

I was extremely touched by Toni's thoughtfulness towards the boys and toward his entire family, to honor the memory of the boys' father.

It was a Perfect Moment!

If you'd like to check out more Perfect Moment Mondays go to Weebles Wobblog by clicking here.


Lori Lavender Luz said...

Well, except for that YANKEES thing, this is truly a perfect moment.

What a loving gift from Toni -- perfect because of the pillows' composition and design.

And also what a gift Grandpa J is giving his grandsons, a touchstone to their father. It might even be hard for him to do, considering his own loss.

My best wishes to you all as you create your new relationship. Especially to those sweet boys.

Anonymous said...

Love that idea of the pillows! I can imagine how special they are to your boys. What a thoughtful gift to remember their Dad by and also connect them with their Grandpa.

Laina's Corner said...

This was beautiful. Thank you for sharing something so tender. I appreciate your open heart.